Budapest “Phelps” Rothchild was born near the frigid North Pole into a family of fine servants and caretakers. For generations the Rothchild family held the distinct privilege of serving The Fredericks – the most royal polar bear family in all the land. Despite their servant status, the Rothchilds were considered family. And Phelps was a shining star early on, given the distinct privilege of discreetly dispersing of the remains of self-important actors or mistresses King Frederick inevitably slaughtered out of boredom. This work, coincidentally, would one day suit him quite well as the servant of the most famous force on earth: Crunchy White.
One day Budapest’s life would take an unexpected turn when a nearby ice field - being cleared for Al Gore to land his private plane to film a documentary on the damage of private planes - came in sideways and sliced through a deep glacier - separating Budapest from his family. His only possession was a giant Michael Phelps stuffed bear that he carried with him at all times. Budapest loved things that were the best - and Michael Phelps could eat subway sandwiches like no other.
Phelps floated for weeks. Hungry and exhausted he was rescued by the Crunchy White Exotic Animals We Want To Party With Foundation more commonly known by its acronym: SKANKS. All SKANKS rescues lived on the Crunchy world compound, or, “Asia”.
One night at a club, Big Picklez declared: “I want a penguin in a speedo!” In that moment, he laid eyes on Budapest, standing there with his favorite stuffed animal. Without hesitation, Budapest removed the speedo and put it on. Picklez then knew he had found the perfect servant. He called him Phelps after the great pitchman. Immediately a game of STD roulette broke out, and Phelps emceed it with brilliance - ensuring Picklez only caught treatable venereal diseases while the whores all caught herpes from Big Picklez. From that day forward, Phelps became Crunchy White's butler, supremely managing all things that came his way: pregnancy, illegitimate children, misplaced trillions, interplanetary tour management, pop-up candy store development, inter-continental vodka pipelining, tickle fight officiating, temporary ocean removal when the group feels like razor scooting to Europe, as well as the constant in-fighting amongst the giant egos in the group.
Without Phelps, Crunchy could not function eight ball to eight ball, trill to trill, snack to snack.